


Camaraderie

by Heatherlly



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-14
Updated: 2014-02-14
Packaged: 2018-01-12 07:29:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,250
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1183537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Heatherlly/pseuds/Heatherlly
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Back in Camelot, there are standards to uphold and codes to follow, expectations that define the lives they lead. But out in the field on the eve of battle, none of the usual rules apply.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Camaraderie

**Title:** Camaraderie  
 **Category:** Slash (Canon)  
 **Characters/Pairings:** Gwaine/Sir Leon  
 **Rating/Warnings:** M  
 **Summary:** Back in Camelot, there are standards to uphold and codes to follow, expectations that define the lives they lead. But out in the field on the eve of battle, none of the usual rules apply.

* * *

#  **Camaraderie**

* * *

"You finished with that?"

Sir Leon glanced down at the half eaten haunch of rabbit on his plate and then nodded, passing it to his friend before the other man had even opened his mouth to request it. This was the nature of their relationship, such a deep level of understanding that many things never needed to be said at all.

"Thanks," Gwaine mumbled around a large mouthful. "No sense in letting good food go to waste, you know."

"Of course not."

Leon smiled in amusement… as if there was any chance of that happening as long as Gwaine was around. Truly, the man had an insatiable appetite, not just for food and drink, but everything else besides. It inspired relentless teasing among the knights, though Leon secretly admired him for his lack of restraint. Being a much more quiet sort, cautious and reserved, a life lived with wild abandon was beyond his comprehension… and fascinating for just that reason.

"Where are the others?" he questioned after a moment.

"Asleep," came the reply, though Leon barely heard it, suddenly captivated by the way Gwaine was licking the succulent juices from his fingers with soft grunts of pleasure. It wasn't the first time he'd been aroused by one of these fleeting moments of sensuality, but tonight was different… tonight might very well be his last night in this world.

That was the thing about being a soldier. Most would imagine it to be a harrowing existence, faced with the constant reality that one might not live to see another sunrise. But what they didn't realize was that there was a strange sort of freedom in having firsthand knowledge of how unpredictable the future could be. Indeed, closely guarded secrets were often revealed where they might not have been for ordinary people… fear of exposure seemed like a silly thing when death loomed close at hand. Who would be foolish enough not to admit the truth, at least to themselves, when they had every reason to believe it was their final chance to do so?

The last time Leon had encountered one of these moments had been during their journey to the Isle of the Blessed. With those horrifying disembodied spirits swooping down from the sky, piercing the night with their otherworldly screams, had it really been such a big deal that his eyes had been fixed on Gwaine as the other man had changed out of his trousers? Did it matter that he'd grown hard as his gaze had roamed hungrily over that bare backside, perfectly sculpted from smooth skin and lean muscle?

Of course not. Nor had he questioned himself later that night when he'd slid his hand beneath the blanket, stroking himself tentatively at first, and then in feverish abandon, swallowing one helpless groan after another as he'd imagined lying down next to his friend and capturing his lips with his own. What would've happened after that, Leon hadn't been sure… but just the thought of their bare bodies pressed together, hands sliding over warm flesh, had been enough to push him over the edge.

Yes, Leon had found freedom that night in the face of imminent danger, and now here he was again, knowing full well that their chances for survival on the morrow were shaky at best. Queen Annis commanded a formidable army, not to mention that she was driven by the obsessive need to avenge her fallen husband. It was sure to be a brutal battle, certainly not one where surrender would be accepted as a satisfactory solution. The woman wanted blood, and blood she would have.

"What's on your mind?"

Startled, Leon shook himself from his reverie, lifting his head to gaze into a pair of warm brown eyes. "Oh… nothing. That is, I was just thinking about the battle tomorrow."

Gwaine gave him an understanding nod. "Expect we all are. Well, no use worrying about it. Best we can do is give it everything we've got and let fate handle the rest. Nothing more to be done."

That was another quality that commanded Leon's respect. Gwaine was so practical, almost nonchalant about these things. He had a way of putting everything into perspective with a careless word or a shrug, somehow managing to bolster Leon's courage in a way that not even the most impassioned motivational speech could have done. Perhaps it was because deep down, Leon knew the truth when he saw it. Honor and glory were all well and good, but once you were in the thick of the fight, none of that mattered. You just had to keep moving, block and defend, strike out against the enemywhenever the opportunity presented itself. 

Of course a practical attitude offered the greatest comfort,… it was the only one that acknowledged the truth that battle was simply a matter of kill or be killed.

Not that Leon didn't care about the greater good, of course – he wouldn't be a Knight of Camelot if he didn't. But the time to dwell upon that was when the battle was over, once a man had the chance to rest and take satisfaction in the safer world he was helping to create.

"You're doing it again."

"What? Oh, I'm sorry."

Gwaine shook his head, reaching down to retrieve a small object from his boot. "You need a distraction, my friend. Hell, I expect we both do."

The words were spoken with a casual smile as Gwaine lifted the flask to his lips, but not before Leon caught the flash of uncertainty in his eyes. His friend might go out of his way to hide it, but he was nervous, too, wondering if he would die on the morrow… wondering if this single night would be all he had left.

It would be terribly intrusive to call him out on it, however, and so Leon remained silent as the flask was passed his way. The honey mead was rich and heady, the mouthpiece still warm where Gwaine's lips had rested just a moment before. Leon drank deeply and with unaccustomed enthusiasm, driven by the thought that this was as close as he'd ever gotten to kissing the other man, that Gwaine's mouth would carry the same flavor as the delicious alcohol that slid down his throat in soothing waves. Spicy, with the faintest tinge of sweetness, intoxicating…

"Hey, slow down there! Still hours to go before morning, and I don't know about you, but I'm not the least bit tired."

"Sorry," Leon said, handing it back to him with a rueful smile. Never having been much of a drinker, he already felt warm, even a little giddy as he studied his friend's strong profile in the soft glow of firelight. But it wasn't until he'd had another drink, followed by a third, that he made his decision. For once, it was time to throw caution to the wind and lay claim to the one thing he truly wanted.

And yet there was still a rational voice deep inside him, whispering that this was a boundary that should never be crossed, that he could lose a friend, that it would be madness to make a move without at least some small indication that his advances would be welcomed, rather than responded to with horrified rejection. After all, Gwaine loved women… _made_ love to them frequently and with a great deal of enthusiasm. Why would he want to be with another man?

But that didn't necessarily mean anything, being as Leon felt the same way. True, he might not make constant visits to the brothel, and he'd certainly never been chased down by an enraged husband holding a butcher's knife. But he'd always been attracted to women in his own quiet way, might even marry someday if he found one that suited him well enough. That was irrelevant just now, however, belonging to a different world that seemed beyond his reach whenever he left it. It was as if he were contemplating two separate lives – one within Camelot's walls, and the other out here, where no one existed beyond the men who surrounded him.

Oddly enough, these realities did nothing to contradict one another, resting side by side in perfect harmony rather than one struggling to triumph over the other.

Back in Camelot, he'd be content to carry on with the same comfortable existence he'd always known. But beyond those walls? Faced with the reality of mortal peril lurking over the horizon, the need to live every moment as if it were his last? Out here, he was a different Leon… someone more daring, more primal, far more willing to cast his reservations aside and venture into the unknown. In truth, that feeling had been with him for years, though tonight was the first time he'd ever been brave enough to act on his impulses.

"Here, have a little more before I finish it," Gwaine's voice intruded on his thoughts again, holding a distinct note of guilt. "Didn't mean for it to go so fast, but…"

Leon seized the opportunity, allowing his fingers to brush the other man's as the flask was passed once more. Swallowing hard in an attempt to hide his nervousness, he allowed his touch to linger, a soft, subtle caress that he prayed would find the balance he was looking for. It had to be obvious to the point where Gwaine would sense the attraction if he felt the same, yet casual enough to dismiss as nothing if he wasn't interested.

A sudden shift, a swift intake of breath, followed by a stunned silence that seemed to go on forever. Oh yes, Gwaine understood. That much was clear as he glanced down with wide eyes.… not at Leon's hand covering his own, but at the unmistakable bulge in his thin cotton trousers. Oh hell, Gwaine was going to break his jaw, he was going to tell Arthur, he…

"Come on," Gwaine said instead, speaking in a gruff voice as he rose to his feet.

Obediently, Leon followed him past the slumbering soldiers and into the forest, torn between trepidation and cautious hope. Neither man spoke a word until they emerged in a small clearing, softly dappled by moonlight. And then Gwaine spun around on his heel, his expression fixed in – of all things – a huge, self-satisfied grin.

"I _knew_ it," he said smugly.

"What's that?"

Gwaine cocked an eyebrow at him, his eyes dancing with mischief. "That you wanted me."

"Umm…"

"Nothing to be ashamed of. Everyone does. Sort of learn to live with being so irresistible, you know?"

Leon's confusion swiftly gave way to a flash of irritation. He could've dealt with it if his friend had taken offense, apologizing profusely before promising it would never happen again. But Gwaine bringing him all the way out here just to mock him? That was uncalled for, humiliating, even cruel. Without another word, he turned and began to stalk away.

"Wait, where are you going?!"

"I'd rather not stand here and let you make a fool of me," Leon called back over his shoulder. "Whatever you thought… well, you were wrong."

He heard the swift sound of footsteps behind him, but he wasn't prepared for the arm that slid around his waist from behind, pulling him flush against Gwaine's body. So warm, so lean and strong, and… oh gods, the man was hard as a rock, a tantalizing length of rigid flesh pressing against his backside. He let out a sharp gasp, feeling the heat of it even through the layers of clothing that separated them.

"I was wrong?" Gwaine rumbled against his ear, making his entire body quiver. "That's a damn shame. Because you see…" he paused, catching Leon's lobe gently in his teeth before soothing it with his tongue. "I was hoping…"

"You weren't wrong," Leon interrupted in a shaky voice. "I've just never…"

"Never done this before," Gwaine finished for him, pushing his collar aside to nibble his neck.

"Right, and I was beginning to think you'd brought me out here to…" But the rest of his words were lost as a hand slid down his chest and past his stomach, untying the laces of his trousers with a series of deft motions. "Oh…"

He could feel Gwaine smile against his neck as he began to stroke his hardness, slow and steady, strong fingers dancing across his heated skin, pressing more firmly into his flesh in all the right places. But of course, Gwaine didn't need to be instructed on these things – he was a man, too, no need to rely on anything other than sheer instinct to drive Leon out of his mind with desire.

"I brought you out here so we wouldn't be overheard," Gwaine murmured, the words low and husky. "Trust me, my friend, you'll be making quite a bit of noise before I'm done with you."

But Leon was beyond responding at that point, trembling, wordless, a willing slave to Gwaine's every command. There was no need to be nervous, not even when he ended up on the ground with his legs in the air, panting in anticipation as the other man poised himself above him. No, he wasn't the least bit frightened, not even of an erection that was thick and heavy, one that would no doubt inflict quite a bit of pain the first time he was breached. Gods, it was worth it for the pleasure that was sure to follow, and more than that, this felt right somehow. He would bleed for this man on the battlefield, had already done so on more than one occasion, and now… he was happy to make that sacrifice for another reason entirely.

It wasn't love, at least not in the romantic sense, with promises of fidelity and vows of commitment. No, this was bigger than that, the strongest way to cement the bonds that lay between them… deep friendship, camaraderie, absolute trust. It might happen a hundred times in the future or even just this once; either way, it required nothing more than the moment itself to be complete.

Gwaine leaned over him then, giving him a savage kiss that contradicted the surprising gentleness with which he spoke as he pulled back and stared deeply into his eyes.

"Don't worry, I'll be careful. Just relax…"

He took it slow, even though his body was already sheened with sweat, visibly shaking beneath the power of his need. Just a little at a time, coming to an abrupt standstill whenever he felt the least bit of tension, leaning over for a deep, almost leisurely kiss or reaching down to stroke Leon's cock for a few minutes before giving it another go. It was only when he was buried to the hilt that he began to move in earnest, a pressure that was uncomfortable at first, but soon gave way to maddening jolts of pleasure with every penetration.

Beautiful seemed like an odd description to attribute to another man, but there was no other word for it. The sight of Gwaine straining above him, his lean, well muscled body glistening in the moonlight would've been enough, but the rest of it… head thrown back, thick, chestnut locks tumbling over his shoulders, handsome face slack-jawed with ecstasy…

Leon was so mesmerized by him, in fact, that he didn't even realize he'd been stroking himself with a great deal of enthusiasm until he climaxed with a shout of both surprise and intense, almost blinding pleasure. Letting out a grunt of approval in response, Gwaine moved faster, thrusting harder, fingers digging into Leon's thighs with an exquisite bite of pain as his entire body shuddered, then finally went limp.

"Shit, that was…" he struggled to say a moment later, still panting heavily as he flopped down at Leon's side.

Leon could only nod mutely in agreement, still stunned in the aftermath of a pleasure that had been so much more… more… there wasn't even a word to do it justice.

"Been a while since I've done that."

"I would've never guessed that you, I mean…"

Gwaine propped himself up on one elbow, giving him a devilish, if somewhat exhausted grin. "Just a few times, all of them before I came to Camelot. Unacceptable by some people's standards, sure, but I say 'why the hell not?' Feels good, no one gets hurt, no reason not to do it."

Leon mulled that over for a moment. "I suppose that makes sense."

"Not so easy for you though, eh? You're a 'follow the rules' type if I've ever seen one. Not that I'm complaining, mind you, but I would've never expected you to just go for it the way you did."

"I'm not…" But the protest died on Leon's lips, because of course, Gwaine was right. "Well, I just thought it might be my last chance, my _only_ chance. If I die tomorrow, what is there to lose?"

"And if you don't?" Gwaine said, giving him a shrewd look.

Leon hesitated. "I still won't be sorry. If I'd kept it to myself, I would've always wondered what I was missing. And now I know."

"You're satisfied with that?"

"Yes, I think so."

Gwaine let out a soft chuckle. "Might not be as easy as you think."

"What do you mean by that?"

"Knowing what you're missing can be a good bit harder than being left to wonder. Never met a man who could do something once and leave it at that, not if it's something that suits him."

Frowning, Leon set up and reached for his trousers. "What are you suggesting? I can't just… if we manage to survive tomorrow, everything will go back to normal once I'm back in Camelot. Besides, I don't even know if I want… I still might want a wife someday, children…"

"Not what I mean." With a reluctant sigh, Gwaine rose and reached for his discarded clothing. "I'm only saying that it's all right to take pleasure wherever you can find it as long as you're free to do so. Nothing to be ashamed of, and hey, life is short. Do what feels right to you, eh? Nobody making the rules here but yourself."

"I… all right." 

Fully dressed now, Leon lapsed into silence. He wasn't sure how he should behave now that it was over, but felt more at ease when he realized that Gwaine didn't expect anything more than the usual camaraderie that had always existed between them. Indeed, there was nothing more than a benign smile and a friendly pat on the back as the other man suggested that they should return to the others before they started to wake up.

Yes, there was no pressure here, no awkwardness or unspoken expectation. They were the closest of friends, just as they'd always been… closer now in light of the secret they shared. And what a beautiful secret it was, one that would enhance countless nights of solitary pleasure for Leon whenever he revisited the memory of Gwaine's finely sculpted body, painted in sharp relief against a star-studded sky on a balmy April evening.

But of course, that had only been the first time… it wasn't destined to be the last.

~*~  
 **THE END**  
~*~


End file.
